Episodes
Beyond the Mirror: The Psychology of Self-Perception, Aging, and Iden…
Why is it that the person we see in the mirror so rarely matches the one we feel ourselves to be on the inside? Why does aging feel like a betrayal of the image we’ve carried for decades? And why do we often hold onto outdate...
When Dreams Get Loud: What Your Mind Is Trying to Tell You
Have you ever woken up from a dream that felt too loud to sleep through—full of noise, emotion, or urgency that clung to you long after morning came? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr answers a list...
The Psychology of Confident Ignorance
What happens when we stop thinking—but still feel sure of ourselves? In this episode, RJ Starr breaks down the psychology of confident ignorance: why we mistake familiarity for understanding, how modern distraction and mental...
The Psychology of Attire: How Clothing Shapes Identity and Perception
What we wear is more than just fabric—it’s psychology in motion. In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the powerful relationship between clothing and the mind. How does attire influence confide...
The Psychology of Approval: Why Being Liked Feels Like Survival
Why does disapproval feel dangerous, even when we know better? In this episode, Professor RJ Starr unpacks the psychological roots of our need to be liked—from evolutionary survival patterns to social rejection and identity f...
Regret and the Mind: Why We Dwell on What Could Have Been
Have you ever found yourself lost in the past, replaying decisions and wondering how life might have turned out if you'd chosen differently? Regret is a universal human experience, but why does it linger? Why do our minds fix...
The Psychology of Ethics, Dogma, and Morality: How We Decide What’s R…
Why do we feel so certain about our moral beliefs while others seem misguided—even dangerous? In this thought-provoking episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the deep psychological forces that shape ou...
Why Smart People Make Dumb Emotional Decisions
Why do intelligent, high-functioning people so often make emotionally reckless or baffling decisions? In this episode, Professor RJ Starr unpacks the psychological gap between intellectual intelligence (IQ) and emotional matu...
The Psychology of Hostile Elders: Aging, and the Decline of Social Gr…
Why do so many older adults seem angrier, more impatient, and less socially graceful than previous generations? What happened to the dignity, composure, and manners that once defined aging? In this episode, we explore the psy...
Why We Need to Be Liked: The Emotional Cost of Validation
Why does a compliment feel like oxygen—and silence feel like a threat? Why do we keep checking for reactions, even when we tell ourselves we don’t care? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks the...
Why We Love Violence: The Dark Psychology Behind Our Social Urge to W…
Why We Love Violence: The Dark Psychology Behind Our Social Urge to Win, Control, and Punish Why are we so drawn to violence—not just in movies and media, but in everyday life? From binge-watching brutal TV shows to shouting ...
Why the Bad Sticks: the Psychology of Negativity Bias
Why do we fixate on one negative comment even after receiving dozens of compliments? Why does one bad day feel heavier than a week of good ones? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks the powerfu...
Memory Home: When the Place That Held You Is Gone
In this emotionally rich episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the powerful concept of the memory home —a place that holds your story, your safety, and your sense of self—even if it’s no longer there. ...
The Psychology of Perception
In this thought-provoking episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks a deceptively simple statement by spiritual teacher Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj: “In my world, nothing ever goes wrong.” Blending timeless ph...
Psychology of Rejection Sensitivity
Why do we fear being left out? What makes rejection feel so deeply personal? The Psychology of Us dives into the emotional terrain we all navigate—unpacking the unseen forces that shape how we think, feel, and connect. In thi...
The Psychology of Mockery: Why Some People Derive Pleasure from Other…
Why do some people take pleasure in mocking others when they’re in distress? Why is public ridicule so normalized in sports, politics, and online spaces? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores t...
When All You Can Do Is Witness
When All You Can Do Is Bear Witness: The Quiet Power of Staying Present in a Hurting World In a world obsessed with action, results, and performance, what happens when all you can do is feel ? What if you’re not the one who r...
The Lie of Finding Yourself: Why Self-Authorship Is the Real Work
In this transformative episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr dismantles one of the most deeply ingrained myths in modern culture—the idea that you must "find yourself" to live authentically. Through the lens of...
Why We Hate to Wait: The Psychology of Patience
Why does waiting feel so unbearable? What’s happening in our minds when we’re stuck in traffic, refreshing an email inbox, or counting down the days to a big event? In this episode, Professor RJ Starr explores the psychology ...
Anywhere But Here: Longing, Escape, and the Myth of Arrival
Anywhere But Here: Longing, Escape, and the Myth of Arrival is a deeply reflective episode exploring the psychological and emotional complexity behind our desire to be somewhere else—somewhere quieter, freer, better aligned w...
The Psychology of Denial in a Crumbling America
This is a spoken narration of my essay titled You Can’t Light the Fire and Then Complain About the Heat: The Psychology of Regret, Denial, and Self-Inflicted Harm. If you’d like to read along: https://medium.com/@ProfRJStarr/...
The Psychology of Self-Preservation
The Psychology of Self-Preservation: Understanding Silence in Leadership and Everyday Life What makes a person look the other way when truth is being trampled? Why do institutions, especially those tasked with protecting the ...
Extinction Bursts – Why We Resist Change Before We Adapt
Have you ever tried to quit a habit only to find yourself indulging in it even more before finally letting go? Or ignored someone’s message, only to receive a flood of follow-ups? Welcome to the world of extinction bursts —th...
The Psychology of Emotional Unintelligence in Public Life
"The lack of emotional intelligence represented by the American populace in this thread was staggering." -------- What happens when a nation confuses outrage with strength, and cruelty with conviction? In this powerful, speci...