Episodes

Empathy is one of those words we hear constantly—be more empathetic, teach children empathy, demand it from leaders. Yet for all the talk, very few people can actually explain what empathy really is. Most confuse it with bein...

Why does it feel like people are constantly on the hunt for something to be offended by? A passing remark, a careless joke, even the tone of a post can ignite outrage that spreads like wildfire. In this episode of The Psychol...

We don’t like to talk about envy. It’s one of those emotions that feels petty, even shameful — something we’d rather deny than admit. Most people will tell you they’re “happy” for someone else, maybe even “inspired” by their ...

What does it actually mean to live by your values? Not to write them down. Not to say them out loud. But to live them—especially when no one’s watching. Especially when you’re tempted to do otherwise. In this episode of The P...

Why does being second feel so uncomfortable? You’re already going fast. The car in front of you is, too. But something in your chest tightens. You feel the pressure to pass, to get ahead—even if it changes nothing about your ...

We think of sarcasm as funny. Harmless. Witty. But what if sarcasm is doing more than making people laugh? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , we take a deeper look at sarcasm—not as a personality trait or comedic style...

You’ve done everything right. You’ve shown up. You’ve taken care of people. You’ve made it through the day. And now, finally, it’s quiet. There’s no immediate crisis pulling at you, no emergency to fix, no one urgently needin...

Jealousy isn't just about insecurity—and it's definitely not just about trust. In this episode, Professor RJ Starr explores the deeper psychology behind romantic jealousy: where it comes from, why it shows up even in healthy ...

A Psychology Talk for Police Officers - But It’s Really About All of Us This episode features a series of excerpts from a live, hour-long talk I was invited to give at a law enforcement conference. The audience was a room ful...

In this intimate episode, Professor RJ Starr explores the deep emotional and psychological importance of storytelling in old age. Why do the elderly revisit and revise their memories? Why do we feel the urge to correct them? ...

Why is it that the person we see in the mirror so rarely matches the one we feel ourselves to be on the inside? Why does aging feel like a betrayal of the image we’ve carried for decades? And why do we often hold onto outdate...

Have you ever woken up from a dream that felt too loud to sleep through—full of noise, emotion, or urgency that clung to you long after morning came? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr answers a list...

What happens when we stop thinking—but still feel sure of ourselves? In this episode, RJ Starr breaks down the psychology of confident ignorance: why we mistake familiarity for understanding, how modern distraction and mental...

What we wear is more than just fabric—it’s psychology in motion. In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the powerful relationship between clothing and the mind. How does attire influence confide...

Why does disapproval feel dangerous, even when we know better? In this episode, Professor RJ Starr unpacks the psychological roots of our need to be liked—from evolutionary survival patterns to social rejection and identity f...

Have you ever found yourself lost in the past, replaying decisions and wondering how life might have turned out if you'd chosen differently? Regret is a universal human experience, but why does it linger? Why do our minds fix...

Why do we feel so certain about our moral beliefs while others seem misguided—even dangerous? In this thought-provoking episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the deep psychological forces that shape ou...

Why do intelligent, high-functioning people so often make emotionally reckless or baffling decisions? In this episode, Professor RJ Starr unpacks the psychological gap between intellectual intelligence (IQ) and emotional matu...

Why do so many older adults seem angrier, more impatient, and less socially graceful than previous generations? What happened to the dignity, composure, and manners that once defined aging? In this episode, we explore the psy...

Why does a compliment feel like oxygen—and silence feel like a threat? Why do we keep checking for reactions, even when we tell ourselves we don’t care? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks the...

Why We Love Violence: The Dark Psychology Behind Our Social Urge to Win, Control, and Punish Why are we so drawn to violence—not just in movies and media, but in everyday life? From binge-watching brutal TV shows to shouting ...

Why do we fixate on one negative comment even after receiving dozens of compliments? Why does one bad day feel heavier than a week of good ones? In this episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks the powerfu...

In this emotionally rich episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr explores the powerful concept of the memory home —a place that holds your story, your safety, and your sense of self—even if it’s no longer there. ...

In this thought-provoking episode of The Psychology of Us , Professor RJ Starr unpacks a deceptively simple statement by spiritual teacher Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj: “In my world, nothing ever goes wrong.” Blending timeless ph...